05/17/2015 by @Sit_With_It - 2 Comments

Congratulations to the Class of 2015 New Student Affairs Professionals!

The following is the speech I gave at the graduation reception for Western Illinois University’s College Student Personnel program 2015 graduates. I share it, slightly amended, because I think that it applies to all graduates entering the field of student affairs as new professionals. Congratulations to everyone!

Hello, parents, family, and friends. My name is Sarah Schoper, and it is wonderful to stand before you here today. I want to start off by thanking you for being who you are because who you are has had a profound impact on the students. I have truly valued getting the opportunity to learn with each of them, and find them to be amazingly, beautiful individuals. I look forward to seeing how they contribute to the world around them, and cheering them on from afar.

(You should be forewarned that my mom told me to be funny so that I wouldn’t cry, and what I’m going to share is my attempt to do that.)

As you may have heard from your student, I decided to take a last minute sabbatical this semester (they probably referred to it as a trip to the hospital). Apparently, I felt the need to do a little more research on the biology of learning, and have indeed discovered that the experiential learning cycle is how learning occurs, that neurons need to connect to build pathways in the brain for learning to happen, and that we take in information through all of our sense that contributes to our learning, amongst other things. I am still in the midst of my research, also known as therapy, but so far, I can assure you and your student that I’m doing everything I can to teach only accurate and true information. It is this most recent research process that I’ve engaged in that has led me to five points, I want to share with the graduates to consider as they continue on in their life’s journey.

1. Celebrate everything (and if you do so with nonalcoholic mimosas, various owl gifts, inspirational items, orange nails, and motivational quotes) all the better! In our world, it is far too easy to see the glass half empty rather than half full. Don’t underestimate the small steps you take because they add up over time to big changes.

2. If you are doing your job well, you will be uncomfortable and feel quite challenged. (no, this doesn’t mean that you should go around instigating issues haphazardly). Going into the field of student affairs means that you get the opportunity to impact every day (no matter your position) the lives of the students you interact with in ways that are life altering. This enormous amount of responsibility and privilege should leave you feeling uncomfortable and challenged for many reasons, including that by doing so you are also continuing to grow and develop. (which, as we learned together in theory class, most of us don’t want to do.) So, breathe deeply, stand tall, and be persistent as you find yourself feeling uneasy, it might just signify that learning is about to happen, which is hard, but also might just provide an amazing opportunity to grow.

3. (and this relates to the point I just made about seeking out uncomfortable experiences and challenging yourself.) Do your best to step back so that you can get a different perspective on the situations you are experiencing. This can mean taking time to quietly reflect while going on a walk and/or it can mean discussing a situation with a trusted friend or mentor in order to help process out your experiences. We discussed once in class how we tend to focus on those who we interact with the most (which are also those who happen to be like us the most), but remember it is important to be aware of those we don’t spend time with and to consider why that might be. Especially since student affairs exists to serve all students.

4. It is okay to be protective of your environment, so that you can be yourself, and perhaps more importantly, so that you can have hope. In almost every class, we’ve discussed the interaction between environment and person, and we’ve established that it has a profound impact on how a person makes sense of the world, which in turn has a profound impact on what they contribute to the world. If you don’t create space for hope to exist within the educational environment, it is far too easy…especially these days, to become negative and cynical, which will then impact the work that you do and the learning that occurs for your students. If you don’t believe me about this, consider times when you’ve been around people who are pessimistic about their experience and how easily their negatively caught on and became the thing to do…almost without conscious realization of it. You will pass along such negativity to those coming to you for help if you do not create space for hope.

5. (and perhaps most important) Show love to everyone around you. I know that you are all capable of doing so, because you have shown it to me (especially this semester as I’ve been doing my research 🙂 ). Doing so, won’t always be easy either (again, sort of like this semester), but it has the ability to transform the world into a kinder place, and I know this because it has transformed me.

During your program interview days, I remember sitting in the academic discussion, and one of you asking me to share what I’ve learned from the students since I had just finished talking about how learning goes both ways. At the time, I had a lot of thoughts in my head, and stumbled through my answer—the student came to WIU, so I must have done something right. 🙂 Now, that you all are about to graduate, the answer to that questions seems so clear. I’ve continually learned how to love more unconditionally, and for that, I am ever grateful. You’ve helped transform me into a stronger person, and I thank you for that because I’ve needed that strength this semester. One of my mentors, Marcia Baxter Magolda, once told me to never underestimate the students, and I sincerely believe that and encourage you all to hold onto it. All students have something to contribute, and it is amazing and beautiful to acknowledge and an honor to be a part of that.

So, in conclusion, I will leave you with two quotes. First, a Christopher Robin to Winnie the Pooh quote (seems sort of fitting at a graduate level graduation):

The second quote is from a spoken word poet, Shane Koyczan: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZfhpD42Z4Y The specific quote I read starts on 4 minutes, 2 seconds.

“Shine in the dark places. Lend the world your light.”

From my heart to your heart, thank you for helping me to find my light this semester—I can only hope that I have returned the favor and helped you to find yours during your time in the program. Congratulations!

04/10/2015 by @Sit_With_It - 9 Comments

Seven Lessons I’ve Learned From My Strokes

2015 has been quite the year to say the least. Lately, I’ve been reflecting on various ways in which I’ve begun to establish a “new normal” for myself. The following are 7 of those ways:

1. Thank goodness for long arms. They’ve helped me be a state rated basketball player for blocked shots in high school, and make the all-conference team, and they’ve annoyed me when I’ve gone clothes shopping. But mostly these days, I’m ever grateful for their ability to reach…especially when taking a shower. I currently get the opportunity to take a shower in a shower chair, which means an extendable shower sprayer had to be installed too. Ideally, before I take a shower either I or my husband remember to take down the sprayer and set it in the tub, but there has been occasions in which it has been forgotten. During these situations, I used my arms to get it down without having to stand up, so that I don’t fall over (falling would pretty much be the worst thing that I could do). My arms have also helped me greatly in putting on my afo, getting dressed, and in completing other tasks that require a long reach.

2. The quad cane has multiple uses. This realization really should have been something that occurred to me after watching the Pixar movie Up for the first time. But, the many uses of it are coming into full effect now that I have one and use it. I’ve used it to reach for puzzle pieces accidentally dropped on the floor. I’ve turned it around to use the hook end to grab my MDH rehab bag. I’ve used it to open and close various curtains in my house. One day I will hopefully no longer need the quad cane for walking, but I might just keep it around for its other functions.

3. There are added benefits to living in the South. I returned home at the end of February, and for the first few weeks there seemed to be a direct causation between my need to go to therapy and bad weather. Unfortunately, this put a kink in my opportunity to take walks outside. It has since turned to spring 🙂 , and I enjoy walking around the neighborhood. But, I did notice how envious I was of my friends living in warmer climates during the end of February and most of the month of March. Of course, I think I would feel different if it was July/August that I was talking about…I’d probably be complaining about the heat. I fully support all of us getting the month of February off to move to a warmer climate to heal in various ways.

4. Fast does not exist. M.C. Hammer declared Hammer time, and there now exists Sarah time. It isn’t a matter of me waking up early enough, or not trying. It is simply that I cannot move fast. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not ridiculously slow, but I take a more relaxed pace these days.

5. It is sometimes better to not have answers. When you don’t know why something occurred, you have more time to do things like notice each day how much the spring flowers have grown, the trees have bud, and you appreciate the birds chirping. When you know the answers to things you often have a responsibility to use those answers to inform your experience in the world, and it can cause you to not notice many things.

6. Living takes courage. Prior to all of my health concerns, I don’t think I was fully aware of how much courage it took for me to live my every day life. I certainly realize it now, and more fully appreciate the people who are giving me opportunities to live. Yes, I look different when I’m walking, but in order for me to get better, I need to be given chances to do what I used to be able to do. Asking for those opportunities and then taking advantage of them takes all of the courage I have left. I get that providing me such opportunities might make some people feel uncomfortable for whatever reason, but honestly I can’t help but feel so strongly that those folks need to work on getting over it. Those issues aren’t mine, they are the other persons and to truly be accepting of others we need to be aware of what is our stuff and what is their stuff and what they are doing to our interactions/relationships. After all, we are in this world together.

7. Learning is painful. I had a student once who coined the phrase “if you aren’t crying, you aren’t learning”. I don’t know that crying is necessary, but pain is most certainly necessary. Both here in Macomb and when I was in Peoria, if I shared with any of my therapists that I was feeling physical pain of any sort, their response was often “Good! Pain is the first feeling to come back, so hopefully it means it is waking up.” This, of course, was not the response I was aiming for, yet I did notice the pattern associated with pain and physical ability improvement.

11/13/2014 by @Sit_With_It - 1 Comment

Learning is Messy

Learning is messy.

I was sent this image a few years ago from a former student, and I think it perfectly portrays the learning process….at least for me.

Recently I’ve been revisiting the blurriness that the learning process is for various reasons (let’s be real…I’m probably do this more often than not since my research is on the learning process, so I probably don’t need to use the word recently or revisiting 🙂 ). One of the reasons I’ve been spending time reflecting on the learning process is because of what it means as a faculty member, which like other positions (e.g., student affairs professional), is no easy feat. Parker Palmer wrote a book titled: The Courage to Teach, and the title couldn’t be more true.

Learning takes courage no matter who you are, and spending time each week trying to facilitate learning for and in front of others requires that one learns themselves, so it is at least just as challenging. I could draw connections at this point to the concept of vulnerability that Brene Brown talks about:

or remaining unfinished that Paulo Freire wrote about:

I’m not interested in doing that, however, because all that would I would be doing, or at least how it would feel to me, is that I would be intellectualizing the complicated process of learning. That don’t fully get at the messiness of learning. So, instead, I thought I would put together my own visual description of the learning process in relation to how I experience it.

Enjoy! 🙂

At the beginning of the process, I’m usually pretty content. Feeling like things are going good.:

And then something new enters my world and I can’t see where it is going to take me fully, but I’m curious enough to give it a try.:

I admit that usually in the beginning I try to reject it.:

And/or worse, I think I already know all about it.:

Until I start to realize that what was once familiar I now don’t know what to think about?!?:

And I start to question all sorts of things and how I’m making sense of them???:

Through that process, I start to see things, but I’m not fully confident in them.:

And in trying to incorporate what I’ve learned, I stumble, make loads of mistakes,:

and experiences lots of failures.:

Until I reach a point where I start to understand it more clearly, which usually results in me feeling so excited and thinking about it all of the time!:

at which point, somewhere in the process it starts to become habit, or a part of how I see the world around me.:

Now, while I wrote this whole process as though it happens in a linear fastion, it is in no ways linear (please see the first visual image I included in this post). It is messy, but it is also interconnected.:

And eventually brings me back to feeling pretty good, but with a slightly different way of viewing the world.:

07/10/2014 by @Sit_With_It - 0 comments

Considering Social Class in my Classroom Learning Environment

This morning I finished reading Social Class on Campus: Theories and Manifestations by Will Barrett. I purchased the book for several reasons.

One, social class is an area I want to personally continue learning more about as I find myself noticing it more. I’m also considering incorporating a focus on it in the Internship 2 course that I teach, which currently contains a focus on chaos theory and disruptive innovation theory. I’ve been considering social class a disruptive “innovation” to higher education in my mind for the past few years, but am still wrapping my head around it so have not yet incorporated it into that course.

Second, the book contains personal narratives in the last chapter, and I’m always looking for such narratives to add to the courses I teach. I am of the belief that learning occurs best when it connects to lived experiences, and providing the lived experiences of others can sometimes help to build those connections. Perhaps not at all surprising is the challenge in actually finding such personal accounts in print. One of the points that the books contains is that valuing narratives of lived experiences is not often something valued by those in a higher social class–hence, a potential reason as to why I am always on the hunt. A final reason I selected the book was due to the structure in which it was written. Each chapter contains suggestions for activities, as well as discussion questions at the end. I value both of these as an educator for myself and others.

I gained a lot to “sit with” from the book, and would recommend it to others working within higher education. Social class isn’t necessarily one of those areas that gets a lot of attention directly, yet as I reflect on all of my experiences and conversations on college campuses (starting with the college search in high school) it is an ever present guiding force. This I’ve known, but continuing to learn more about it allows me to “see” it even more. As an undergraduate student, I recall being told by an administrator that it was refreshing to work with a student wearing flip flops and a ponytail, and similar, yet different, messages continue to be sent to me as a faculty member.

At one point in the book, Barrett discusses how students who are the co-creators of knowledge are more likely to reach self-authorship. Self-authorship in a very reduced definition is a way of making meaning in which an individual determines their own values and beliefs while seeing others’ views as important, separate, and worth considering (Important to note: Separate does not mean disconnected). This internal value and belief system enables individuals to consider experiences from multiple perspectives and make responsible, ethical decisions for the common good. Arguably, this is the goal of higher education.

Barrett draws the connection between types of pedagogy found in courses hosted at various institutions (discussion based, lecture style, etc.) and class. For example, a student who was able to attend a high school where discussion was valued in the classroom might seek out a college experience where the classroom experience is discussion based. He then draws the connection to those students being more likely to be self-authored. This was one point in the book where I found myself thinking two thoughts:

One, simply because something is discussion based does not mean that students are developing toward self-authorship. Baxter Magolda provides several examples of various ways, including lecture style learning environments, that promote self-authorship, and the key, according to her, is the incorporation of all principles and assumptions within in the learning partnerships model (a model designed specifically to promote the development of self-authorship). My own experience in higher education demonstrates that discussion based learning environments to do not inherently promote self-authorship, as it was not until my graduate education that I was asked to “situate learning in my own experience”, as well as experience being “validated as a knower”–the two principles missing from Barrett’s discussion about what is necessary to develop toward self-authorship. I engaged in discussion based classes at my own undergraduate institution, yet, I was rewarded for being able to argue/defend/repeat claims made by others about the field of study–not consider those claims in terms of my own lived experiences, which would have validated that I brought knowledge with me to the classroom.

The second thought I had was not to dismiss quickly the point Barrett was making. This got me thinking about the classroom experience I seek to provide, and the messages that are being sent about class. It is extra complicated when considering that,

“We all have a social class of origin, a current felt social class, and an attributed social class” (p. 7).

I’m still working on exactly where I land with the classroom environment I try to create (I just finished the book this morning!). I do know of at least three ways that I can be more inclusive, so that even if students are being taught cultural capital in a variety of ways throughout all of their experiences (this is a whole other blog post, and is really just one type of capital..it sure is complex stuff), they aren’t being asked to completely reject whatever cultural capital they do bring. So, here are my list of three:

1. Provide on my syllabus information about purchasing any books electronically. Often publishers allow for purchasing of hard copy and electronic copy with the electronic copy being less expensive. I’ve also already done this one, but want to keep doing it…work with the library to make sure that the assigned books for class can be checked out of the library.

2. Discuss class attire on the first day of class. Learning does not require business clothes. I look forward to seeing how this conversation goes this fall.

3. Continue to have library orientation and technology orientation involved in the Intro. class I teach. Continue also assisting students in learning APA style through a continual learning process, rather than provide a workshop and expect that they “get it” after the workshop.

06/27/2014 by @Sit_With_It - 0 comments

Wouldn’t it be GREAT if Support Could Take Away the Challenge?

In student affairs, one of the “go to” standard responses (especially during the job interview process) when asked how one translates theory to practice is to provide challenge and support. The origin of this phrase in the field comes from Nevitt Sanford’s (1967) theory of challenge and support. I’m not always certain based on my experiences, however, that the theory translates over into the field exactly how it was designed. In fact, the more experiences I’ve had in the field the more I’ve found myself responding by asking the question, “what do you mean by that?” or “what does that look like?” when I hear someone say that they will “challenge and support the student.” I ask these questions because in my experience using challenge and support often looks like this:

Step one: Student finds a student affairs professional and says that they are overwhelmed/stressed/upset/not doing well with something.

Step two: Student affairs professional listens to the student and then helps the student figure out what to do about the problem. The help that is given to the student more often than not involves telling the student what steps they need to take.

Step three: Student follows the steps, or does not, and either the problem is solved or it is not (if it is not, and the student returns to the student affairs professional to discuss it again, or the student affairs professional hears from someone else that the student didn’t follow the steps they were told to follow, and discussion is often had about how it is the student’s fault for not “accepting the help” they were receiving…in other words, not doing what they had been told to do)

Step four: Student affairs professional feels good because the professional helped provide support for the student as the student was experiencing challenge.

I can’t help but wonder, however, if students are learning from such experiences what they should be learning from institutions of higher education. I’m also not sure that using challenge and support in this way is what Sanford intended… as I don’t really believe in the idea of using support to remove the challenge. I also don’t believe it is very helpful to create relationships with students where they are dependent on student affairs professionals to get the answers to their questions. Doing so often results in students repeatedly coming back to student affairs professionals to ask what they should be doing in a variety of situations, and student affairs professionals telling them how to address their issue (although this might make us feel popular/wanted as student affairs professionals, it has potential to result in quite a number of challenges for students upon graduation when they no longer have a student affairs professional to go to for all of the answers to the challenges they are experiencing). I’m not saying that students should be ignored when they seek out help, or be told to “figure it out” for themselves. Rather, I think we want students to learn to consider what they already know and how that might help them navigate through whatever experience they are being challenged by. Doing so, does not mean that students are alone in the process of navigating through whatever challenge they are experiencing, but rather it means that we partner with them. In other words, the support we provide is us being with them as they work through the challenge. I actually experienced such support this morning as I installed a ceiling fan.

Yes, challenge and support is applicable to all learning experiences…including installing ceiling fans. 🙂

This is the finished product:

Yet, it almost didn’t become a finished product because I had reached a point of maximum frustration and impatience (lots of “this is stupid” and “why did I ever start this?” kinds of thoughts were occurring both in my mind, as well as being muttered under my breath). You see, I have learned just enough about changing out lights/fans/etc. that I am now the family member volunteered for such home improvement projects when visiting relatives. Given that I currently am visiting my sister, I was volunteered (and agruably I volunteeered myself, although I am hesitant to admit it given my most recent Sarah-as-an-electrician fan installation experience) because I wanted to do something nice for her (she is having surgery today, and I thought it would be nice to do something nice for her to experience when she returned home). I had most certainly reached a point where I just wanted to be told what to do by someone else to solve the problem of the switch not working after I thought I had done everything I should have done. So, reached out to my partner, John, and asked him to do just that. I even, in quite a sassy tone, told him that I didn’t know what to do and was done.

“I’m done. I quit. Just tell me what to do.”

Instead of responding by telling me what to do, he asked me to explain what steps I had taken. At first, I will admit, I was quite frustrated by this question. I didn’t want to tell him what I had done, I just wanted the switch to work!!!

Once I told him the steps I had taken, he asked me what I knew about why it might not be working. This led to us determining that perhaps the wiring wasn’t as straight forward as it appeared. In other words (this will make sense if you’ve ever done any electrical work) matching the black wire to the black wire, and the white wire to the white wire no matter how many times I did it was not going to provide different results (indeed, my continual repetitive trials of doing so were already proving this!).

At this point in time, I had calmed down enough that I started to consider again what might be going on. This time, however, John and I problem solved together, and the question of how we could figure it out was raised. This led to me getting on the internet and searching words that explained the experience I was having. At the same time, John thought that perhaps looking at the wire connection of a switch hook up in another room could help. Once we each did that, we discussed what steps we would take next and low and behold we got the switch working. (Hallelujah!)

Funny enough, John providing me with this kind of partnership, instead of just telling me what to do, has actually resulted in me feeling satisfied and motivated to install a second ceiling fan. While I shared this experience as an example of the kind of partnership that reflects a more complex way of providing challenge and support, and not one in which John used support to “solve” my challenge, it also illustrates the motivation and skill development that results from such partnering.

The next fan I will be replacing:

(Yes, you are correct…that is a baseball fan ;))

06/10/2014 by @Sit_With_It - 0 comments

New Experiences

In one of the courses I teach, I include an assignment where the students are asked to have an experience on campus that they would not usually have, and then spend time reflecting on that experience, as well as considering what they’ve learned about themselves. The assignment is usually one of their favorites, and the students gain a lot of insight. Most of the students indicate that they are going to commit to having other such experiences because they see how much they learned just by attending and participating in a new experience. Unfortunately, making such a commitment doesn’t always result in actually participating in new experiences. I don’t think the students I teach are unlike most of the rest of us when it comes to new experiences. It is much easier to stay with what is comfortable and familiar. Yet, just as the students I teach discover, new experiences quite often lead to undiscovered insight.

One could say that new experiences are always had when new books are read. To a degree, I can understand this perspective. However, there can be comfort and familiarity with books too. Certainly, it is important to deepen one’s learning about a topic, but perhaps the “newer” of the new experiences comes from reading about a completely new topic and/or reading authors who come from backgrounds unfamiliar to you. I’ve been having such a new experience lately, as I make my way through the book: The Misrepresented Minority.

I actually selected the book because I knew that I would learn new information, and so far, it’s been great! The book is a series of chapters discussing the experience of various Asian American and Pacific Islander experiences at institutions of higher education. (SO important to know!) So many different experiences are shared, and in such vulnerable ways, that I feel my brain being stretched and curious to learn more. I’ve had no troubles reading the book, and often find myself wishing I had a conversation partner I could discuss it with. I do plan on using exerts from the book in various classes starting this fall, which I believe will greatly enhance the courses I teach.

Another new experience I am about to embark on is experiencing Atlanta, Georgia. I am presenting at the Cross Cultural Fraternal Advisors Institute, which is being held there.

The most I’ve ever experience Atlanta, is the airport, so this is most certainly a new experience. I admit that I’m a bit anxious, but I’m also excited. Hopefully I will discover some good food, and establish some new connections with colleagues.

What new experiences have you sought out recently?

02/13/2014 by @Sit_With_It - 1 Comment

Learning Lessons

I find myself reflecting a lot this week on the concept of learning lessons, and where the phrase “I hope you’ve learned a lesson” originated. It has always felt like a scolding of some sort to me. So, I did a Google search to see what the Internet had to say, which only confirmed the connection I was making to being scolded. The FreeDictionary.com’s definitions included the phrases “bad behavior” or “unpleasant experiences” (what the dictionary.com had to say about it).

Yes, this does mean that I had an encounter recently with this lovely idiom (it usually surfaces about this time of year), and my experience reminded me of what Derald Wing Sue shared at the Lilly Conference this fall (2013) regarding microagressions. I was left with the feeling that the other person was trying to put me in my place. Yes, I have many new things to learn about in life, but there are also things I have already learned and new experiences only deepen that learning. This experience is contributing to the deepening kind of learning, and has often occurred in my life because, as someone once said to me, “I don’t show full respect for the privilege others have”. Don’t take that mean that I go around like a bull in a china shop because that is not the case. That wouldn’t do any good even if I wanted to do so. I own that I am still exploring what it means for me to “not respect the privilege others have” given that I have privileges myself (and I probably always will be exploring this, but I will save that for a future post :)). I do believe that this most recent experience, and these reflections about it, are a part of that exploration. Much to sit with.

I also think the phrase “I hope you learned your lesson” is supposed to elicit feelings on my part…where I am supposed to feel bad that what I did is now causing troubles for other people. And I often do dislike greatly the amount of time and energy that is spent dealing with such situations (yes, it would be so nice if such experiences never happened), but I don’t believe that I am intentionally trying to be difficult. Rather, I am being me, and yes, I can be asked to be incongruent with who I am, and I often am asked just that (please note, these are rarely formal requests), but there is a cost for me to do so, thus the decision is not an easy one to make. It never really feels like the phrase “I hope you learned your lesson” acknowledges that cost. And then what do you do if in staying congruent to who you are there is a cost for others? It can be tough stuff to navigate. Again, much to sit with.

I share all of this because it is on my mind, and also because I work in the field of education, which means that there are often “lessons” we are supposed to want others to learn. And in reflecting on those lessons, I can’t help but hear a connection to what James Zull (2002) calls the “Teaching Trap” in his book The Art of Changing the Brain. Essentially, Zull discusses how learning is always happening, but the question we should be asking is if the learning we want to be happening is the learning that is occurring, or is something else really being learned?